We took off after Christmas dinner to visit family up in Northern California. First stop was Santa Cruz (well, technically Bonny Doon) to visit the boys’ Granny and their aunt and uncle, too. Next up was Discovery Bay to see cousins and kids, their great aunt and great uncle, and “Mimi,” their great-grandmother. A quick stop-over in Sacramento to see Uncle Jackpot, their little buddy Logi, and his fam, and finally back home again in time to celebrate NYE – a special day, as it’s the night I met their father four short years ago. More to come later on road-tripping with twins, but here are some photo highlights.
We are SO thrilled, especially because of my recent loss. Turns out my husband and I are pretty good at this baby-making thing. Now to figure out where we’re going to put all the new diapers we’ll need…
In all seriousness, though, I have been really down about my miscarriage. It didn’t seem fair. We wanted that baby so much. This was a much needed blessing, but it doesn’t take away from the pain of loss. I’ll always mourn my June baby just a little bit, but I am thrilled to be expecting an August one.
I remember before getting pregnant, I thought it was crazy to announce an early pregnancy. And with the boys, I was wary. I waited until we saw clear heartbeats twice to announce at ten weeks. Even at that point, I got awful comments. “You know you could lose one, right? It happened to so-and-so…” And “Oooh, you’re almost out of the woods. Miscarriages are so common first trimester.” Such ugly thoughts from people who do not think before speaking. I spent my whole first trimester terrified of vanishing twin syndrome – or worse, losing both.
With my second pregnancy, I vowed to not be paranoid. What good would it do to worry? I had one healthy pregnancy; everything would be fine. Except of course, it wasn’t fine. What a cruel trick – to not have been worried enough, I thought.
But I have realized that it doesn’t do any good either way. Worry or not, things will happen and you will have no control. So I’ve decided to embrace this pregnancy and shout it from the rooftops. I’m “only” six weeks, but there is a life inside of me and I want everyone to know. I relish all the congratulations and good thoughts. I welcome all the prayers. And goodness knows I will need the support.